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[January 14, 2007 @ 10:16pm] |
Things seem kinda...I dunno, clunky since we all got back. Everyone still seems a little shell-shocked, and I guess I can't blame them. Me, I'm still trying to put myself back together---losing out on a month of your life kinda DOES that. I feel sorry for those people who go into comas for longer periods of time, 'cause it's just...disorienting, coming back out of it.
At least I can be fairly sure that nobody raped me when I was in my coma, and no, I haven't been watching Kill Bill again, shut up...
Things aren't ever going to be the way they were before the big explosion. Maybe it taught us all something, I don't know, but---but I feel like everyone's drifting apart, and goddammit, I don't like it. I---I lost---things---to this explosion, but I still have to keep on living. Shit, we all have things and people to keep together for.
So. I can't play in the band anymore 'cause I've lost thirty percent of my hearing in my right ear and a little more than that in my left. That doesn't mean I'm leaving you and Naruto and Hinata high and dry, Shikamaru. Just means we've gotta...adapt a little.
I'm sorry that it took me so long to get this myself.
...I sleep now. Comments will be replied to after I've caught some zs.
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|
| fidelity |
[December 01, 2006 @ 9:31am] |
| [ |
music |
| |
"Fidelity," Regina Spektor |
] |
Rumors of my death have been greatly exaggerated, as Mr. Twain liked to say. Yeah, so I lost a month of my life to a hospital bed, but I've healed up now! Well. For the most part. Enough so that I can be back at school, safe and sound and all that jazz.
Seriously, guys. I'm back. Writing this as I unpack all my shit back into my dorm room, actually; kinda wondering how rooming with Shino's gonna go. He seems real put-together an' nice, and heck, Kiba loves him, so I guess he can't be too bad :D.
So. What've I missed?
( [Private] )
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| Gender Switch |
[October 24, 2006 @ 8:23am] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 pretty? WTF. |
] |
I forget how much I hate lipstick. Stuff tastes awful.
Yuck :P.
Wearing a kimono isn't so bad, even though it took Dad an' me an hour between the two of us to figure out how to tie a decent obi.
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|
| Backwards Day |
[October 23, 2006 @ 9:34pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 bitchy |
] |
/Filtered so that Daddy Dearest cannot see/
YOU KNOW WHAT? FUCK YOU. EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOU. I HATE EVERYONE HERE. I'VE NEVER CARED FOR ANY OF YOU, AND IF YOU FELL OFF THE FACE OF THE EARTH, I'D CHORTLE A LITTLE AND MAYBE GO TO YOUR FUNERAL FOR THE FREE FOOD.
OH, AND TAYUYA? YOU'D BETTER BE WAITING IN MY BED TONIGHT, YOU GODDAMN SLUT. I'M GOING TO HAVE YOU SCREAMING MY NAME SO LOUDLY, YOU'LL FORGET ABOUT ELVIS FOR TWO WEEKS. HELL. YOU MIGHT EVEN FORGET YOUR NAME FOR A COUPLE DAYS, THE ORGASMS WILL BE SO AMAZING.
This was physically painful to write. I'm going to go soak my fingers in Listerine and then watch Carebears.
/End Daddy Filter/
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|
[October 09, 2006 @ 7:45pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 calm |
] |
...this whole keeping up on journaling crap? I'm bad at it. Real bad. Not much has been going on lately, though, so I've felt okay with just sort've letting things hang...
The last couple of weeks in review:
♠ Went home to deal with Chouichi being in the hospital. Sat in a chair in his room for most of a weekend, dodging sporks, crumpled up napkins, and paper airplaces (he claimed he needed to practice throwing since he was missing football practice).
♠ Went clothes shopping with Dad. Huzzah for parkas and hoodie sweatshirts.
♠ Took up knitting again. I want a Jayne hat.
♠ Saw Jiro at school.
♠ Forgot about the history midterm >_<;.
♠ ...still need a partner for the speech class.
And that's about it.
OH. AND DAD. I've been taking my pills---don't worry about me, and please, please stop reminding me about them every time you see me. Ilu Dad.
( [Private to Jiro] )
( [Private to Yuya] )
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| Check, Plz |
[September 07, 2006 @ 9:15pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 anxious |
] |
ONE: My brother is a moron. A fat moron. Sorry, Dad, but it's true.
TWO: I'm going to be gone for a couple days.
THREE: I can't believe Jumbo called me. WTF. And just when I thought I'd had it all figured out...I guess there's more than one way to get laid back home? God. I haven't seen him since he broke my jaw in two places. Seriously, life: WTF.
I'm sorry about the concert.
|
|
| ...chitchat |
[August 28, 2006 @ 8:49pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 indescribable |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
"Leather," Tori Amos |
] |
Thank God I heal up quick. For real, if I wasn’t so good at taking a beating, I would’ve spent half my teenage years limping around. Jiro would’ve made damn sure of that. To those that care, my unmentionables aren’t swollen or bruised anymore, my lip has scabbed up all pretty, the claw-marks on my neck have faded, and the bruising on my face has mellowed to a sweet greeny-gray-yellow color. It offsets my tats just great.
This week, I’ve discovered four things:
Tenet one: I have both a pair of balls and a spine. I should pay more attention to this.
Tenet two: I really don’t give a damn about the way people look at me for my weight. I’m not gonna smoke anymore to curb my appetite, so no, I probably won’t look like I did last year ever again. From this point on, I’m gonna eat what I want to when I want to, and nothing but my doctor’s disapproving looks will convince me otherwise. Food is one of those few things that has always made me happy, so screw it.
Tenet three: My Dad’s just about the most amazing person living, though he may be tied with Asuma-sensei. It’s a tough call.
Tenet four: Shikamaru needs a nanny. Normally, I’d dibs out, but it seems like I’m the most apt for the job.
( Private to Kiba )
( Private to Tayuya )
( Private: things I’m mulling over still )
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|
| ...okay. Sure. I'll bite. |
[July 28, 2006 @ 8:14pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 flirty |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
"Cuppycake," DJ Rankin |
] |
I can't believe it took me so long to realize this.
Naruto, why didn't I find you ages ago? Seriously, man. We're...like...two peas in a pod. We were made for each other.
TO YOU, FROM ME: ♥
And before anyone asks, no. No, I am not drunk.
( [Private to my Blond Beauty] )
|
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| birthday wishes to a bedraggled dog |
[July 07, 2006 @ 9:42am] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
complacent |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
"Awkward Last Words," Armor for Sleep |
] |
HAPPY BIRTHDAY, KIBA.
Come see me next chance you've got, okay? I've got something for you.
|
|
| Starting over. |
[July 03, 2006 @ 5:59pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 apathetic |
] |
Moved into Shikamaru's room.
Yeah, I know. WTF.
But things are...better. I think.
...
And Tayuya, I refuse to call my son Lamp. I'll name him Choubi, or Choumaru, or something.
|
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| MY CLOTHES |
[July 01, 2006 @ 7:50pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
cranky |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
watching Grandma's Boy |
] |
Uh.
Guys. Where the FUCK are my clothes? My pants? My shirts? My boxer-briefs?
What would anyone want with my underwear? They're fucking HUGE. We're talking tents, guys. Boxer tents. That smell like fat boy.
Give me back my shit, please, whoever took it all.
|
|
| Back. |
[June 23, 2006 @ 11:59pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
calm |
] |
Back. And feeling…better. I’m not going to say I feel ‘lighter’, ‘cause hell, I just spent a week with my dad on a worry rampage. I don’t think either of us left the kitchen once, between his compulsive stress-cooking and my compulsive stress-eating. Despite that, I had some nice long conversations with Dad, and that always makes things better, somehow. Seriously, I think being a father in the Akimichi family automatically makes you Buddha. Talking helped. It helped a lot.
I think I can finally start getting my life back on track. Yeah, I know. Finally.
|
|
| now all i've got to show // for the seeds that didn't grow // is agony |
[June 11, 2006 @ 5:08pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 crushed |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
"Agony," EElS |
] |
Skipping the festival. Sorry, Ino and Shikamaru, I just can’t…concentrate. I’m going back home for a couple days. Dad’s in town again, and I…I need to talk to him. Not sure if when I'll be back. Yell at Asuma-sensei if I don’t show back up by the end of the week.
Screw this school. Screw---screw everything. I’ve been trying, but you know what, I can’t be what ‘Yuya and Jiro want and what Shikamaru and Kiba want at the same time. I tried, I failed, and now I’ve gotten innocent people hurt.
So no, not going to the festival today; I’ll take an incomplete. And no, I don’t want to talk about it.
( [Private to Kiba:] )
( [Private to Tayuya:] )
( [Private to self:] )
|
|
| Well, CRAP. |
[May 22, 2006 @ 1:47pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 sick |
] |
Sick.
Guess it wasn’t just stress. Last I checked, I was running a fever of 102…I feel better, just…well, not better…but I’m resting an’ drinking water an’ stuff, and it’s gone down from the fever and pains I had yesterday. I was hallucinating then. Kept seein’ this…person in a effin' sheet…and hearing stuff…but that made me feel less sick, if that makes any sense. Maybe it was one of those ghosts Ino’s always going off about?
Probably didn’t do me harm to sweat off a coupla pounds, though, but I wish things would stop spinnin’ long enough for me to take a shower. I smell like sweaty fat boy. Mmm. Eu de Fat Kid.
Could someone write down today’s homework for math and get it to me sometime this week? I’m not getting out of the basement anytime soon. It’s nice and cool and dark in here…*snuggles Mr. Naked Sheepie-Sheepie*
I’m sick, I’m hungry, and I miss my Dad. I need ice cream.
( [Private to Tayuya:] )
( [Private to Temari-san:] )
( [Private to Shikamaru:] )
|
|
| so brown-eyes / i hold you near |
[May 16, 2006 @ 2:00pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
nauseated |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
Death Cab for Cutie, "Soul Meets Body" |
] |
Someone found me throwing up in the boy’s bathroom and narked on me to Shizune. When I find out who did it, I’m gonna take ‘em out back. She said I hadn’t been eating enough, and that my body was reacting to a bit of a stress overload or somethin’. I didn’t really need her to tell me that; I know I’m stressed out ‘cause of Tayuya and Shikamaru and everyfuckingthing else. I don’t think anyone has ever told me I’m not eating enough before. I mean. God. It’s the other way around, nine times outta ten. It’s ‘good Lord, Chouji, lay off the snacks’, not ‘you really need to make sure you eat enough’.
Hey. At least I got a sucker out of the deal. The cup is half-full, right?
Which reminds me. Hey Naruto, Shikamaru---and Hinata-chan---I might have a place for us to play in town next weekend. My dad talked to a friend of his, who owns that little club near the KU campus---Dare, I think it was? Anyways, he said they’d like us to try out for playing their Friday night crowd. Think we’re up for it?
( [Private to that skinny bastard who got himself bashed up] )
( [and Private to the wench that did the bashing] )
|
|
| Aftermath |
[May 08, 2006 @ 8:53pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
crushed |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
"Who Wants to Live Forever," Breaking Benjamin cover |
] |
At least I waited until after the show to throw my guts up. Guh, not good with getting up in front of people and actually pullin' out my shit...but it turned out pretty good, I think. I wasn't shaking so bad that I screwed up even when I realized she was in the audience..., thankfully.
I might even do it again sometime.
( [Private.] )
|
|
| and if I were gay, we would swim in romance / but I’m not gay / so get your hand out of my pants |
[May 03, 2006 @ 12:56pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
cranky |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
"If I Were Gay," Stephen Lynch |
] |
What the hell, Inuzuka. Seriously, what the hell. If this is just another branch in your ‘out-pranking’ of Naruto, know that I’m not going to be a part of that. I will not be some---some joke. Don’t you fucking dare try humiliating me---growing up as ‘the fat kid’, I’ve had more than enough humiliation from my peers to last me well on into old age. I’m only doing this because you won’t leave me alone any other way, and I want to find Mr. Naked Sheepie-Sheepie’s missing limb---which your mutt still refuses to give up. I’ve asked, and I swear to God he said ‘no’ back to me. Someone tell me the dog can’t talk. Please.
This is not a date. This will never be a date. I’m not gay. Know that I have no problems with beating the shit out of you if you make a fool out of me.
Relationships fucking suck.
|
|
| Happy Birthday |
[May 01, 2006 @ 1:17pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
crappy |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
"Birthday Song," Orange Pekoe |
] |
First day of classes. First day of National Math Awareness Week. May Day. My seventeenth birthday.
The first person to try throwing me a party gets killed dead. Remember: I am the sock ninja. …even if I’m still sleeping in the basement, rather than sharing a room with Sasuke. I have balls, I swear.
( b-day swag I got from the folks back home )
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